It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
