Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
