id be glad to
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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