can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
and you said cock pushups were impossible
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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