I just made out with a guy for $7.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Of course I have a pirate flag
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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