piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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