Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
