If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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