I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
