i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
