We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
