drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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