so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
you never un-have a 4some
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
