Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
