dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize