The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
