Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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