So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
