I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
