whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
