Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
