She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
jump out the window naked night went bad
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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