I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
