I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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