there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
