marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
