Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
