judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize