Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
