i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
