Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
