Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize