just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
My penis needs a shock collar
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize