is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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