You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
