Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
