i barfeds in our rink
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize