Christians are straight up FREAKS
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
We smell like vodka and hangover
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