She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
