he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
