dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
