Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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