I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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