just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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