I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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