I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Less talking, more tequila
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
