Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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