better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
