so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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