the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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